Little Boy Lost
by Raeperk57
Summary: A look at Lee's early life.
1. An Unwelcome Call

Captain Robert Clayton was leading a joint meeting with officers from all four branches of the military when he was interrupted by the buzzing of his intercom. After excusing himself from the group, he impatiently hit the connecting button. "Jenkins, I thought I told you no interruptions."

"Excuse me, sir. There's a call for you. It's the overseas operator; an emergency call from Mrs. Helen Clayton."

What was his mother calling for? It must be rather urgent. He'd been stationed around the world the last eleven years, and in all that time he had not received one phone call from her. Not only was the time difference usually a factor, the cost of an intercontinental call was prohibitive. He turned to the men in the room. "Gentlemen, we'll discuss this later. Say, 1400 hours?" To Jenkins he replied, "I'll take that call."

"Yes, operator, this is Captain Robert Clayton…Yes, I'll accept the call…Mother?"

"Oh, Bobby…" he heard a very distraught voice over the line. It sounded as if she'd been crying.

"Mother, what is it?" The captain was concerned over the tone of her voice and the fact that she had called him Bobby; something she had not done since he insisted on being addressed as Robert at the age of twelve.

"Bobby!..." his mother started wailing. " It's Matt…he's…dead!" Her wailing became louder and he could barely understand her words until they stopped completely. He thought he heard a thud as if something heavy fell on the floor.

"Mother? Mother!" There was a long pause before another voice came on the line.

"Robert, this is Doris Johnson, Doc Johnson's wife."

"Mrs. Johnson, where's my mother? What happened?"

"If you could hold on a moment, he'd like to speak to you. He's attending to your mother."

A moment later Doc Johnson came on the line. "Robert," he said in a tone which denoted that of a long time family friend, "I'm sorry, your mother collapsed. I may need to give her a sedative when she comes around."

"Doc, cut to the chase. What's going on? Did my mother just tell me my brother Matt is dead?"

"Yes, I'm afraid she did. He and Jennie were in a car accident. They were killed on impact. I'm sorry. I was at the hospital when they were brought into the morgue. I asked the police that I be the one to break the news to Helen. I know how fragile she was when your father was killed in an accident two years ago. I was concerned she would not take the news well. I offered to call you, but she insisted she be the one to tell you. However, from what I observed of her behavior, I'm not convinced she will handle this any better now than she did then."

"Doc, about Skip, er Lee…does he know?" Robert could see his nephew in his mind's eye. Lee was the spitting image of his brother and the apple of his parents' collective eye. He could only imagine how hard this news would be on him.

"Not yet. Your mother was watching him tonight for Matt and Jennie when they went out and had already put him down for the night. I asked Doris to meet me here. With your permission, I'd like to bring him home with us to stay for at least the night. He gets along with our boys well. Do you want us to tell him? I'll assume you'll make arrangements to come home for the funerals?"

Robert Clayton paused in thought. He knew he would have to come home to take care of the funeral arrangements, remembering how heavily his mother depended on him and Matt when his father died. Matt's own father had died of influenza about a year after returning from World War I, so his older brother never knew his father. Two years later, his mother met and married Daniel Clayton. He was a good man and raised Matt as his own. When he died, Robert and Matt took care of everything in deference to their mother's fragile state. However, Robert had to return to Berlin to continue working on making sure West Germany's entrance into the NATO alliance went smoothly. He left knowing Matt and Jennie would look after their mother's needs. The pact was nearly in place, however, there were still some details that needed ironed out. His mind was brought back to the present when he heard the doctor's voice reminding him he was still waiting for an answer.

"Thank you, Doc. I guess that will be best. I'll make arrangements to fly out as soon as I can. I think it's best if he hears the news from me. I'll call when I land at Dulles to let you know when to expect me," he sighed resignedly.

Captain Robert Clayton hung up the phone, a frown on his face as he contemplated, "What am I going to do with a kid? I love my nephew, but I don't know anything about raising children." He also was aware that his work with the NATO, while now in place, would require a couple more years to establish its smooth operation in a volatile region of the world which was no place to raise a child. He knew he had some hard choices ahead of him as he made his way to see his commanding officer to request emergency leave.


	2. Memories and Reality Collide

As Robert settled in his seat on the plane that would take him on the trans-Atlantic flight, his mind wandered back to the last time he was home. While most of the memories of that time were unpleasant, there were shining moments as well, such as the first time he had met his nephew. Lee had been born shortly after he'd been assigned to Berlin. Yet, in spite of that fact, Lee had formed a close bond with his uncle. You could be sure where you would find the one; the other would not be far away.

Robert recalled the last time he had seen Lee; he was barely out of the toddler stage. Lee loved his "Uncle Bobber" as his name came out of the young child. He remembered with a smile, lifting him up and throwing him up in the air and catching him, and the squeals of delight that came from Lee. The two were nearly inseparable regardless of the tragic circumstances that brought them together. Robert nicknamed him Skip because Lee always appeared to be scampering after him. He had to chuckle looking back at the only time he offered to watch Lee so Matt and Jennie could have a night out. They looked at him skeptically, and with sidelong glances at each other, happily accepted his offer. The look of merriment in their eyes was lost on Robert when he said, "I deal with fifty to a hundred men each day. How hard could it be to look after one small boy?"

Before long, Robert realized he was in over his head. He was no match for the exuberance and boundless energy of a near three-year old; especially one who had wormed a bowl of ice cream out of him. It wasn't long before he had to concede defeat and call in reinforcements. Doris Johnson and her husband, Nathan, were long-time friends of the family who had three boys of their own; one of whom was close in age to Lee. When she arrived, Robert had been trying to coax Lee to go to bed. There were toys everywhere and dishes in the sink. In the no-nonsense manner of a mother, she had Lee settled in for the night following a warm bath and a bedtime story. She entered the kitchen just as Robert was washing the last dish in the sink. She quietly walked over, picked up a towel and began to dry and put away the dishes.

Sensing something was bothering him, Doris began speaking. "Nathan said he'd stay with Helen until Matt and Jennie get home and you can relieve him. Would you care for some coffee, and you can tell me what's on your mind?"

Robert, usually a reserved man, nodded as he sat at the kitchen table. Doris poured coffee for each of them and sat opposite of him. She waited patiently as he gathered his thoughts.

"I guess I'm feeling rather guilty. I'll only be here for a few more days and then I have to return to the base, leaving Matt and Jennie to deal with the aftermath and Mom's health. They have so much to handle along with caring for Skip. I feel like I'm shirking my duty here. That's part of the reason I wanted them to have a night out." He chuckled wryly, thinking of how quickly Lee had found the way to his heart. "Skip is quite a handful in and of himself."

Doris smiled. "That he is." She reached out and laid her hand on his arm. "But Matt and Jennie would not feel as if you were _shirking you duty_ as you put it. You have a lot of responsibility; first, to your country, and then, to your men. And in an indirect way you are fulfilling your duty to your family by ensuring their safety. There may come a day when you may find you will be called upon to take a more direct, active role in that responsibility. Until then, be content in the knowledge that they are proud of you and want you to fulfill the destiny life has handed you."

Thinking on that conversation two summers ago, Robert wouldn't have believed that that day would come so soon.


	3. The Monster Within

The next morning as he showered and dressed for the day, Robert pondered what Doc Johnson had revealed to him last evening concerning his mother's state of mind. He was still holding out hope that this was all a part of the grieving process, but memories of her behavior when his father passed away just two years ago persuaded him that Nathan was probably right. And while she never favored one son over the other, there was a special bond between her and her elder son; and she adored her daughter-in-law. Their deaths hit her hard. She rarely stopped crying last night and had to be given a sedative when her grief turned into hysteria.

At one point that evening, she started talking about how she was planning to create a new quilt for Matt and Jennie. She detailed the design she planned, punctuating it with her hands. When gently reminded that they were dead, she initially ignored the reminder until Robert stood in front of her and held her hands in his to still their movements. When faced with the stark reality in his eyes, she snatched her hands from his and then started beating his chest, all the while screaming, "NO!" The doctor suggested that Robert have her evaluated to confirm his belief that she was suffering from a mental breakdown. As much as he wanted to deny it, his mother could pose a risk to herself and others; possibly even Lee. How _would she react to the little boy when he was the spitting image of Matthew? Would she become violent with him too?_ he thought. She had been known to swat them when they misbehaved as children. To the best of his knowledge, neither Matt nor Jennie ever laid a hand on their son.

His thoughts turned to his nephew. What was he going to do about Skip? He still hadn't told him about his parents partly because of his mother's condition, and, he had to admit it to himself, he dreaded the look he'd see in the boy's eyes when he realized he'd never see his parents again.

Lee woke up that morning wondering where he was until he recognized his room at his grandmother's house. Then he remembered he had woken up at the Johnson's yesterday morning. He didn't even know how he'd gotten there. He was very confused. Why was he staying at his grandmother's? Why wasn't he at home? And where were his parents? He missed them. Then his mind recalled something else from yesterday. Uncle Bobber was here! He hadn't seen him in so long, but his parents had made sure he wouldn't forget who he was since his last visit. He remembered they had fun together until Uncle Bobber had to leave. He bounced out of bed, hurriedly dressed and ran into the kitchen hoping to see if he was still here. He entered the kitchen and found his grandmother at the stove fixing pancakes.

"Those smell good!" he said with a big grin.

Helen turned around. "Matthew, I hope you washed up before coming downstairs. Tell your brother breakfast is ready."

A look of consternation crossed his face. "My name is Lee, Grandma."

"I don't have time for your games, Matthew. Go get your brother!"

"But, G-gr-andma! My name i-is L-lee!" He didn't understand. Why did his grandmother keep calling him Matthew? He stood looking at her, confusion written on his face.

"Matthew Davis! Enough of your games! Go get Bobby now!" His grandmother was starting to get angry. Before he could move, she grabbed him by his shoulders.

Robert had been in the bathroom, shaving, when he heard her raised voice. He hurriedly wiped his face, and ran to the kitchen in time to see her grab Lee, and shake him. He took her hands from his shoulders gently, but firmly, so she was forced to release a visibly shaken Lee, who had a terrified look on his face. As soon as he was released he bolted from the house, the screen door slamming shut behind him. Robert sighed heavily, knowing he'd have to deal with his young nephew as soon as he calmed down his now hysterical mother. He gently folded her into his arms and ran his hands up and down her back to soothe her. He then gave her a dose of the sedative the doctor had prescribed for her, and encouraged her to lie down for a while. When he was sure she was asleep, he went in search of his nephew.

It had become clear to Robert that his mother needed more help than either he or Dr. Johnson could give her. He would see if he could make an appointment to see a psychiatrist at Parker General after the funerals tomorrow. Then he had to make a decision about what to do with Lee; but now he had to have the conversation he'd been dreading since he first heard the news of Matthew and Jennie's deaths.

"Oh, Matt, you always were so much better coping with these situations than I was. I'm used to giving orders, not contending with emotional outbursts. I never had to worry with you here taking care of the home front. I'm flying blind here. I sure could use some of your brotherly advice right about now," he lamented.

Fortunately, Robert didn't have to look far for Lee. As he suspected, Skip was in the treehouse he and Matthew had built in the front yard when they were young. They spent many hours and shared many confidences there while growing up. Somehow it was fitting that this is where Lee hears of the fate of his parents.

"Skip, are you okay? Is it okay if I come up?" At Lee's assent he made his way up. It had been years since he'd been up there, but it brought back many memories. At the look on his nephew's face, Robert thought some of those memories just might cheer him up, and make the news easier to take. _And give,_ he thought, wryly.

"I was just about your age when we built this treehouse. Dad and Matt did most of the work. I basically just handed them the tools they needed. But we had many good times up here. It was a fort, a pirate ship, even Flash Gordon's spaceship."

"Wow! Did you really?"

"You betcha!"

After a few stories, Lee looked at his uncle. "I miss Dad…and Mom. Where are they? Why haven't they come to get me?" Lee didn't want to say anything; he didn't want to be called a scaredy cat, but he had been having nightmares the last couple of nights. He dreamed that there was a monster in his house. He was calling for his mom and dad, but couldn't open the door he was sure they were behind. In his nightmare, he never saw the monster's face. Whenever he got close to looking up at it, he woke up. He didn't think Uncle Bobber was afraid of anything. Lee decided that his uncle might laugh at him, so he kept quiet.

Robert knew he couldn't stall any longer. "I know you miss them, Skip. I do, too," he said sadly."Do you remember your granddad? "

At first Lee nodded his head, and then he thought about it, and shook his head no. "I see pictures of him at home and in Grandma's house."

"Do you know what happened to him? Why he isn't here with us…with Grandma?"

Lee nodded his head."Dad said he went to heaven and he can't come home to us anymore."

"That's right, but he's watching out for us; making sure we're okay." Robert cleared his throat. He sat close to Lee and put his arm around his shoulders. "Skip, we don't know when it's our time to go to heaven. We don't plan it. Sometimes it happens all of a sudden."

"Like with Granddad?"

"Yeah, like with Granddad. "Well, your mom and dad weren't planning to go to heaven, either. They wanted to stay here with us…with you; but they had an accident, just like your grandfather. They went to heaven, too. Now they are all together watching over us."

"You mean I won't see Mom and Dad anymore, Uncle Bobber?" Lee realized what that meant and began to cry.

Not a man given easily to tears, Robert spoke a little gruffer than he intended. "Hey, now, you're a big boy now, and big boys don't cry. You have to be brave for Grandma. And since you're growing up, I think it's about time you call me Uncle Bob."

At the mention of his grandmother, Lee's face clouded in fear once again. "Grandma didn't know my name. She got angry."

"I know, Skip. But your grandma is very sad, too. She knows she won't see your mom and dad again, either. She really didn't mean to frighten you. She's just sick and that made her think you were your dad. You look so much like he did at your age."

"Will she get better? Will she remember me again?"

A pained look crossed Robert's face. "I don't know, Skip. I don't know. She may have to go to a special hospital to get better."

As Lee thought about what his uncle told him, he realized that there would be no one to take care of him. He asked his uncle, "What's going to happen to me? Where am I going to live now?" Lee's voice was once again bordering on tears.

"We'll work something out." His uncle responded, not yet knowing what that was.


	4. Hard Choices

Just a quick note: I realized belatedly that I had failed to give Mrs. Clayton a first name. I have corrected that omission and have made the appropriate changes in the previous chapters.

At the funeral, Robert, wearing his dress uniform, chose to stand behind his mother and nephew, his eyes hooded, one hand on each of their shoulders willing them to receive strength from his touch; strength he himself did not feel. Dr. Johnson and his wife sat to the right of Helen. Nathan had felt that a lesser dosage of her medication might be okay so that she may have some memory of this day should she ever fully recover. However, he was ready in the event that the stress may be too much for her. When Helen was handed the flag that had been draped over Matt's casket, tears streamed down her face, but she remained silent except for her quiet sobs. Lee, not yet fully understanding the gravity of the situation, reached out to hold her hand to comfort her while seeking comfort from her touch.

True to his word, following the services Robert took his mother to see a psychiatrist at Parker General. He had made arrangements for Lee to go home with Doris. Her boys would be home from school shortly and Lee could use being with kids his own age. He had asked Nathan to accompany him in his professional capacity to answer any questions Dr. Williams would have regarding his mother's current care and observations of her mental state.

Following an examination and separate interviews with all three, Dr. Williams called Robert and his mother back into his office. "It is my considered opinion after a preliminary examination, and with all the available facts, that Helen be admitted to St. Elizabeth's Hospital until such time that she won't pose a danger to herself or others. She has agreed and is willing to sign the admission papers. Also, during the conversation I had with your mother, she recalled the incident that occurred with her grandson yesterday morning. She has some concerns she'd like to address with you." He turned to Helen and asked, "Would you like to explain, or should I?"

I think I need to," Helen stated quietly with her head bowed, not willing to see the look of trepidation in her son's eyes. "Please understand; if I could be sure what happened yesterday morning won't happen again, I would not hesitate in my willingness to take care of Lee. I am aware you and Matt took care of everything when your father died because I was incapable of doing so then, as well. I love my grandson too much to ever again see the look of fear I saw in his eyes. I know you have to leave soon, but I'm asking you to care for him until such time that I can take over his guardianship."

Robert didn't know how to answer his mother. _How could he tell her that he couldn't guarantee his safety if he were to take Lee with him?_ Not wanting to add to her anxiety, he hedged, "I'll see that he's taken care of."

Dr. Williams made the arrangements to have Helen admitted to St. Elizabeth's, leaving Robert now free to consider Lee's future. Robert promised that he would bring clothing and some of her personal belongings once she was settled.

As he and Nathan were leaving the hospital, Robert stated, "I need to go to the legal department on base to see what papers Matt and Jennie had drawn up with regards to Lee. He told me a couple months after Dad died that he and Jennie had it done, but for some reason he didn't elaborate, and I didn't ask. Now, I wish I had. I'll be around to pick Skip up after I'm done there. Would you mind meeting me at the playground across from Lee's school tomorrow morning before you have to go to the office? I believe I'll have a hard choice to make and I'd like your advice."

"Sure. Eight o'clock?"

"I'll see you then."

The next morning, Nathan arrived at the park across from the school to find Robert already there, a cup of coffee in his hand. As he reached the bench, he was handed a cup of his own. "Cream or sugar?" Robert indicated the packets on the table.

"Thanks. Okay, I'm here. What's on your mind?" Nathan Johnson sensed the young captain had felt out of his league since he arrived four days ago, but had done remarkably well considering the circumstances.

"First, I want to thank you and Doris for being there to help with Mom and Skip. I don't know how I would have made it through the last few days without your support. It's funny; I'm responsible for the welfare of a hundred men every day and it doesn't faze me. So why does having the welfare of one small boy in my hands scare the daylights out of me?"

"Several reasons. First, you're not used to being around children. Second, this child happens to be your nephew, your brother's child. I know you want to do him proud. And third..." Nathan chuckled slightly, "your last attempt at taking care of him didn't end so well, if I remember right."

"No, it didn't," Robert smiled wryly at the memory. As I recall, your wife bailed me out." His facial expression turned serious once again. "But the question remains. Matt and Jennie named me as his guardian. I chose the military as my career. What kind of life is that for a child? Moving every few years? And where I'm stationed at the moment, is no place for a child. We have no family to speak of where he could live until I am reassigned a new post."

"You do have a few choices."

"What? Adoption? No, dammit! He's my only brother's only child. He'd trust me to take care of him. But, how can I take him with me if I can't guarantee he'd be safe! Foster care? Being shifted from home to home every few years? I probably wouldn't be able to keep tabs on him in the system. You know how easily government paperwork gets lost. No!"

"There is one other solution." Nathan Johnson couldn't meet Robert's gaze even as the words crossed his lips.

Robert's eyes took on a thunderous look as comprehension dawned. "Dozier Hall! Are you mad, man! You know what kind of kids they place there! Skip wouldn't stand a chance! And even if, by some miracle, he survives there what kind of future is he going to have with that on his employment record? No!"

"Listen, Robert, that facility isn't as bad as some of them I've seen. I'll personally check it out. Hell, I'll even visit him often to keep tabs on him and personally send you updates on how he's doing. Then when you are transferred to a safer post, you could send for him. We could get the records sealed so no one has access to that information. After that he'd be with you on the bases to which you are posted. He'd get a world class education. Surely any employer would be a fool to turn down someone well travelled and well educated in the ways of the world. All I'm saying is to think about it. The only other option you already rejected flat out, and with good reason. Raising him in the shadow of the Kremlin's reach would mean risking Lee's life, and I've seen you with the boy. You could in no way do that anymore than I could risk one of my sons. At least look into it. Unless, you want to throw away your career that you've spent more than a dozen years to establish; and I can't see you doing that."

Nathan saw Robert was wavering, so he pressed the advantage. "You said that you should only be stationed in Berlin another couple of years. After that, with the work that you have accomplished there, you should be able to pretty much name your next post. You could come back here to Andrews; reconnect with your nephew in familiar territory."

"Great! I've got a Hobson's choice. Whatever I choose, I lose. But worse than that, Skip loses more."


	5. The Past Forgiven

A/N: I expanded Jennie's story a bit from her diary entry in Unfinished Business. My goal was to give a plausible explanation of what they told the family as to how they met.

Oh, if life was as simple as it appeared that day in the treehouse! He had many regrets because of the decisions he made back then. But looking back, he couldn't see how he would have made any other choice than he had. Had he chosen to become a full-time parent that day, he not only would have resented Lee, but his brother and mother as well.

Had it been an option, Robert would have liked to have reached out to Jennie's family in England, and requested that they care for Lee temporarily. That would have made it easier to remain in contact with Skip while he was still stationed in Berlin. However, he had known that the Hamiltons, who came from the landed gentry, had all but disowned their daughter. Even in her late teen years, Jennie had rejected the practice of being introduced into society as a debutante. She had wanted more out of life; planning to have a career in journalism.

When Jennie met Matt's family for the first time, she was surprised at the warm reception she received despite Matt's assurance her she would be welcomed with open arms. Robert recalled the conversation that followed:

 _"_ _Mr. and Mrs. Clayton it is so thoughtful for you want to have a reception for Matthew and I, but it's really not necessary. We don't want to put you out." Jennie said shyly._

 _"_ _Nonsense, my dear! And please call me Helen, and Matthew's dad is Daniel; and this is his brother, Robert." Helen extended her hand with a warm smile on her face. When Jennie's face clouded over, Helen thought she had offended her daughter-in-law. "What is it dear? Did I say something to upset you? If you really don't want to have a reception, we won't have one."_

 _Matt, who had taken a puff from his ever-present pipe, had seen the distress in his new bride's eyes and held one of her hands while placing the other around her waist, drawing her close to him to lend her his strength. "It's not that, Mother. Thank you. Jennie and I are thrilled you want to do that for us. We apologize for springing our marriage on you."_

 _Helen tsked, "Where are my manners? Please, the both of you, come in and sit down and, over coffee, you can tell us how you met and why you didn't inform your family of your intentions to marry." The last was directed at Matt; his mother's face clearly displaying her hurt at being left out of such an important event in her son's life._

 _Matthew and Jennie sat side by side on the sofa, clasping hands, as he began, "We met in January at the President's inauguration where I was working security."_

 _Jennie interrupted, "Yes, it was purely accidental. You see, I'm a reporter. I was sent to cover the inauguration for The London Times. I was rushing to get an interview with Senator Robertson when I tripped over television cables and fell right into Matthew's arms."_

 _"_ _Her apology was so endearing, and I could tell she was flustered, so I led her to a park bench so she could compose herself. Well, one look into her eyes and I was head over heels in love. Of course, it took a little convincing her to prove I was sincere."_

 _The looks they exchanged with each other left little doubt in their audience's minds that they were truly in love._

 _"_ _Excuse me, dear…er, Jennifer." Helen interrupted._

 _"_ _Jennie… please." She smiled warmly at her mother-in-law, relaxing for the first time since entering the Clayton home._

 _"_ _Jennie, what were your parents' reactions when you gave them the news?" Helen couldn't imagine her mother would have been any less hurt than she was at not being a part of such a milestone for her daughter._

 _Once again Jennie's eyes clouded over as she bent her head. "My parents and I haven't spoken in a very long time. They wanted a life of high society for me, but I've had a fascination with the power of the written word since I was a young girl. They refused to support my decision to study journalism, forcing me to find odd jobs to pay for my schooling. I had hoped that my decision to marry Matthew would be the beginning of a better relationship with them, and for a moment I thought they had accepted the choices I made; but when they discovered he was an American, they reiterated their disappointment. My mother refused to talk to me; and my father spoke for a few minutes and wished us well, but I could tell by the tone of his voice that they wanted no further contact with me." Jennie finished quietly, and then began fumbling in her purse for a handkerchief to hide the tears that threatened to fall. Matthew began rubbing his hand on her back in an effort to soothe her, his expression reflecting the pain she must have felt._

 _Helen was aghast at the thought that any parent would act that way. "My dear, I don't know you, but I know my son. I'm certain my Matthew has chosen a woman as his wife that I will be proud to call my daughter, and if you'll allow me the opportunity, I'd like to welcome you into the family with a small reception with just our closest friends."_

If her family was unhappy with her career choice, they really displayed their displeasure when she married the Y _ankee,_ whom they thought was below her station _._ Her parents had died never knowing they had a grandson. Robert sighed. _How could otherwise rational adults be so unfeeling toward their daughter and her family? Not only had Lee lost his parents and grandparents so young in life, but he had been denied knowing his mother's family as well over some antiquated idea of marriage and upward mobility. He remembered William and Ruth Steston, Matt's grandparents. Even though their son had died and his wife had remarried, they still were a presence in Matt's life. In fact, Robert remembered fondly, they made every attempt to include him as an honorary grandson in anything they did with Matt. Lee deserved at least the knowledge that Jennie's parents cared with a postcard or a letter for his birthday and Christmas._

Having no other options, Robert had made the only choice left to him where he could keep tabs on him. He placed him in a children's home Nathan had recommended. It was no wonder why, once they had been reunited, that they never had the same relationship as they had back then.

So here he sat in the officer's club, nearly thirty years later, waiting for Lee and Amanda for a farewell dinner. At least now they had made amends thanks in part to Lee's help in uncovering the truth behind the circumstances of his court martial, and in part to Amanda's influence on his nephew. As he waited for them, he reflected back on the evening following the congratulatory dinner the three had shared after his name was cleared. He and Lee had spent the night in Skip's apartment clearing the air of the hurt and misunderstandings that had festered in their relationship all these years. When Lee admitted he felt abandoned by his uncle at a time when his world was turned upside down, Robert confessed that it was the hardest decision he ever made, including having to send men into battle. While he waited, Robert's mind reminisced over the conversation of that evening:

 _As they entered his apartment, Lee said, "Would you care for a nightcap, Colonel?"_

 _"_ _That would be great, Skip. Scotch on the rocks." As Lee poured drinks, the conversation with Amanda at dinner replayed in his mind. He and Lee were family, yet they were strangers in many ways. He felt it was about time they at least start to remedy that; and as it was his actions all those years ago that precipitated this situation, Robert knew he had to take the first step, "Listen, Lee, I want to thank you for helping to clear my name. It means a lot to me."_

 _Lee, unsure of his uncle's tone, replied evenly as he handed him his drink and took a swig of his own, "Just doing my job."_

 _"_ _No, I really mean it. Thank you."_

 _Lee looked at his uncle in disbelief. Is he really thanking me?_

 _Robert continued, "This is hard for me to admit, but, it occurs to me I owe you more than that. I owe you an explanation for leaving you all those years ago."_

 _"_ _You told me you couldn't take me with you. Let's just leave it at that." Lee didn't want to dredge up the hurts of the past. It never got them anywhere and always seemed to drive them further apart._

 _"_ _No, dammit! I can tell by your tone that you don't believe me, but it's true. It was the hardest decision I ever made." In his frustration, Robert slammed his glass on the table and started pacing. "I was stationed in Berlin, working on the West Germany's entrance into NATO, when your parents died. That was within striking distance of the Kremlin and no place for a child. I didn't want to risk your life, and I couldn't give you the kind of attention you needed. I knew I had at least another year there to iron out any issues that might have arisen. Unfortunately, one year turned into two by the time I was stationed stateside."_

 _"_ _So you thought I'd get that attention in a children's home?" Robert winced at the raw pain in Lee's voice._

 _"_ _No, I knew you wouldn't. But I also knew that foster care would have been much worse; more uncertainty and upheaval in your life. And I flat out rejected putting you up for adoption."_

 _"_ _Well, thank God for small favors!" Lee had been toying with his drink as his uncle spoke, but with that he downed the rest of his drink and poured himself another, waving the bottle in Robert's direction._

 _Robert declined another drink. He had to find a way to bring the conversation back to more friendly topics. "Do you remember our first major argument? You'd only been with me about three months."_

 _"_ _Do I? I had latrine duty for a week after that. All because I wanted to watch The Howdy Doody Show and you said that that show was for little kids."_

 _"_ _Oh come on, Lee. There was more to it than that, if you recall. You stormed out of our quarters and I spent the rest of the evening searching for you. You scared the daylights out of me wondering where you'd gone."_

 _"_ _I remember. I decided to hide out at the mess hall. That was when I met Barney." Lee's expression softened at the memory of his longtime confidante._

 _"_ _I was thankful that's all the farther you got. But there's something you don't know. I watched the two of you for awhile before I made myself known. It secretly made me glad that you found someone who could reach you. I had hoped it would make your transition to base life at least tolerable. That's why, until you were twelve, I arranged for Barney to be stationed at whichever base I was sent. I knew you making friends would be difficult at best and we always seemed to be at odds with each other. You needed someone you could rely on to be there for you."_

 _"_ _I wondered how he managed to always being at the same bases we were. It was too coincidental. While you're in confession mode, may I ask a question?" Lee thought he'd take advantage the open dialogue offered._

 _"_ _Go ahead."_

 _"_ _I have to ask. Why did you call me Diaper Duty until I was sixteen?"_

 _Robert smiled sheepishly at him. "You probably don't remember this, but I decided to give your parents a night off when our dad died. I knew I wouldn't be around when our mother needed support. Since you were basically my shadow at the time, I thought I could take care of you for one evening before Matt and Jennie would be left to handle things at home without me. I didn't know what it took to care for a small child. You really had me hopping. I had to call in reinforcements. I owe you a huge apology for that. I should have just stuck to Skip, eh?" He chuckled at the memory._

 _Lee laughed at the image his uncle's words created. He also realized that it probably was the truth. "It definitely would have been preferable. Okay, I guess I can forgive you. I seem to remember giving Mom and Dad a hard time once or twice also. In fact, I tried my hand at babysitting myself about a year and a half ago, all in an attempt to keep a streetwise genius from being placed in one of those homes under the guise of protecting him. I fared just about as well as you. If it weren't for Amanda's help, Aleksei would have gotten more out of me than an expensive gaming system. She's a wonder with kids."_

Robert had known when Lee had told him he'd had a date with Amanda that he wasn't being honest, and not just about the date. He couldn't really blame the boy. _Boy._ Lee was no longer the boy he raised. He had grown to be a fine man with the ideals to match. But after meeting Amanda, he knew she was different from the other women he'd heard Skip had _dated_ throughout the years.

Robert could see a special bond developing between the two even if they were unaware of it themselves. Sure, he could tell they were friends, and as co-workers they worked well together; but he could sense so much more beneath the surface. Robert had seen his nephew's face take on a new look and the timber of his voice turned softer when he spoke of Amanda. It reminded him of Matt whenever he spoke of Jennie after they'd first met. That boy was well on his way to falling in love with his beautiful partner, even if he didn't know it himself yet; and he seemed to always find a reason to touch her or hold her hand. As for Amanda, he had to smile. She's as gutsy and as spirited as Jennie was, and often stood toe to toe with him. They also trusted each other, and if he knew one thing about his nephew, he knew trust did not come easy for him. Robert let out a depreciating sigh. He knew he was mostly responsible for the lack of trust Skip had experienced early in his life. If truth be told, he was grateful for Harry and the Agency for taking a chance on the wild young man he once was. He knew of the influence Harry, and later Emily Farnsworth, had in molding Lee's character and honing his skills. But, if this past week's events had showed him anything, he could see Amanda had best harnessed those skills as his partner. Robert had heard of the disregard Lee had for his own life after his last partner had been killed, and how he blamed himself for the man's death. Amanda's dogged determination was Skip's salvation. She not only trusted him, but demanded that he trust her in return. Robert laughed _. His nephew won't stand a chance._

He couldn't help but notice the spark in Lee's eyes that had been missing for far too long. He would keep that knowledge to himself for now. Years of experience had taught him that anything he wanted for Lee would be instantly rejected by the younger man; and Robert wanted him happy. He deserved that much.

As for Amanda, although he hadn't known her long, he noticed that her usually bright, bubbly self took on a softer, warmer tone whenever she was around or spoke of Skip. Robert knew that someday they would discover that about each other themselves. There would be no need to put in his two cents worth. It would not be appreciated or believed anyhow. As he was not a man known for his subtlety, he thought it best to stay out what he believed to be a budding romance. Robert thought back to Matt and Jennie. He was sure they would have approved of Amanda and vowed that, as much as was possible, he would encourage Skip to take stock of his life, consider what was important to him, and lastly, never be afraid of grabbing the brass ring. In Robert's eyes, that brass ring was Amanda.

His musings were interrupted as he noticed them as they entered the club and crossed the floor to where he sat. He could hear Amanda admonishing Lee.

"Honestly, as much as that car means to you, I would think you'd take better care of it than you do. Here are the keys you left in the ignition, again." Amanda stated in an exasperated voice.

Robert rose and pulled out her chair so she could sit. "I'm afraid you'll have to blame that bad habit on me. I never remember to pull the keys either. In my case, it's only gotten worse as I have my own drivers when I'm on duty." He surreptitiously gave Lee a wink. "When I was growing up, no one worried about leaving keys in the car."

Lee mouthed, "Thank you," back to his uncle for providing him cover, a twinkle in his eyes.

Robert clapped his hand on his shoulder, smiling broadly as he said, "Now what do you kids want to order? Dinner's on me tonight."

The three of them enjoyed the remainder of the meal, as Robert regaled Amanda with the story of Lee's first car buying experience, much to his chagrin; although he pitched in with his own version of events.

"Speaking of cars, did Skip ever tell you about his first car buying experience?" Robert sent Lee a _challenge me_ glance, enjoying the young man's discomfort.

Lee groaned and hung his head as Amanda, seeing his response, answered him. "No, was it that bad?" A look of enjoyment at Lee's embarrassment crossed her face.

"Bad? It was a disaster on wheels."

Lee threw up his hands and said in exasperation, "Alright, if you insist on telling this story, allow me to tell it. I had been working at a gas station to earn money to buy my first car. I figured once I had five hundred dollars I could buy this sweet, black '59 'vette my buddy was trying to sell. He needed the money for college. When I had enough money, Uncle Bob insisted on seeing it before he'd allow me to buy it."

"Well, I took one look at that heap of junk and told him no. Of course that only made him more insistent on getting it even though I offered to give him a thousand dollars more to buy a more reliable car."

"Yeah, a four-door! No teenage boy wants to be seen around town in a four–door."

Amanda was near to tears laughing at the exchange and the image it brought to mind. "So what happened?" she choked out when she caught her breath.

"I finally won out," Lee said proudly, straightening in his chair.

"Yeah, and it cost you another two thousand dollars trying to get it up and running before giving up," his uncle reminded him. Turning to Amanda, he continued, "He finally asked me to help get a car. I figured he probably learned his lesson, so I compromised and helped him purchase a sports car. It was no 'vette, but at least he wasn't embarrassed to be seen in it."

"I'm not surprised. Lee does have a stubborn streak in him." Amanda said, her eyes daring Lee to deny it.

Instead, he issued a dare of his own. "So tell us, any car skeletons in your closet?"

"What makes you think I have car skeletons in my closet?"

"Aha! You're answering a question with a question. A sure sign you're hiding something. Com'n, give!" Lee crowed triumphantly.

"Uh uh!"

"Come on! I told you mine. 'Fess up."

"No. My one car story has painful memories attached, so sorry, but the answer is still no." Amanda was adamant.

"How about instead you tell us about the sugar in the gas tank you told me about our first case together, then?" Lee questioned.

"Oh, that! Phillip was just mad at Dean over not taking him to a ballgame as he had promised."

"I never did understand what you saw in what's-his-name." Robert thought he detected a note of jealousy in Lee's voice.

"Dean was a very thoughtful man. He really liked the boys. He didn't take Phillip and Jamie to the Orioles game because there was a forty-percent chance of rain that day." Amanda said defensively.

"So why did Phillip put sugar in his gas tank if he cancelled because of rain?" Robert inquired.

"Well, as it turned out, the rain blew over, so Phillip just thought Dean used the weather as an excuse to cancel. It didn't help matters when he and I went to an outdoor concert that night." Amanda giggled at the memory, but she didn't think it was funny at the time. "As it turned out, his car died on our way home, and we had to walk. Halfway there, a sudden storm blew in. We were drenched by the time we made it back. As I told Lee, his car never drove right after that."

Other stories were exchanged throughout the remainder of the evening. As they said their goodbyes, Amanda invited both of them to a Memorial Day picnic later that year.

"How are you going to explain our presence to your family?" Lee asked, perplexed.

"Oh that part's easy. The PTA will have an _Invite a Serviceman to Dinner_ program _._ And as his only living relative, naturally you'll be invited as well," Amanda winked.

Robert and Lee had laughed at how easily she had come up with a solution to what could have been a very tricky proposition. Robert felt a sense of contentment as he fell asleep that night. He had often worried about his nephew, remembering the little boy lost so many years ago. Tonight he knew Lee was little boy lost no more.


End file.
